Investigating How to Heal

Both as an FBI Agent and a Private Investigator, I know people don’t contact me because life is going well.  Usually, when they finally reach out to me people are in the midst of turmoil and dealing with a range of emotions from fear, sorrow, depression, hurt and anger.

They want me to help them end that turmoil.  They need answers and actions.  They look to me when no one else seems able to help.  They want to find out what happened to their loved one.  They want to find who and why someone stole from them.  They want to know how and why someone betrayed them.  They need help to protect themselves and to find justice.

I do help.  I get the answers, and I can end the real world turmoil engulfing their lives.  But, too often both the client and I don’t address the inner storm.  We don’t deal with the emotional pain, the self-doubt, and the anger.  Many good investigators will take the time to listen to and sympathize with their clients.  We’ll offer words of understanding, encouragement, and support.  But as a rule, investigators don’t know how to heal the internal hurt.  That is someone else’s job.

Frequently, the client doesn’t address their emotions either.  The truth does provide a certain amount of freedom and closure. But there often still exists those muddy emotional undercurrents which can suck a person down into the depths of despair, resentment, and pain.

It is important to get help beyond what most private investigators can offer.  We’ve seen clients in various stages of a crisis. The aftermath of betrayal, the questioning of truth, the confusion at what has occurred.   There is also the stigma of the event.   What about your reputation?  What will people think if they find out?  What if?

We’ve seen our clients struggle to deal with the swirling of emotions:  shock, anger, vengeance, despair, grief and the questioning of every single thing they believed to be true about themselves or someone else.

One of the bravest things a person can do is ask for help.  Our clients have already shown that bravery by hiring us and letting us become a part of their crisis.  They lay bare their personal and business lives, so we can gather the facts to help them.

Believe it or not, that is the easy part.  The real bravery begins when our clients ask for help with the emotional aspect. Asking for that type of help is hard.  To some, it means weakness and surrender.  It isn’t.  In reality, it means release from the torment of your situation. It means you have someone to talk, cry and laugh with.  It means you have a person who will guide you through the steps to gain hope and life anew. It means freedom.  It means healing.